I am 53 years old, and tonight, for the first time in my life, I feel lighter, and it has nothing to do with my actual body weight.
On my bedside table I keep a few items I’ve collected and/or received over time - things that are especially meaningful to me. Among them are two cards: one says “Joy”, which we received from our daughters and son-in-law the day we moved into our house - the first we’ve owned in New Zealand, and a second one I bought for myself that says: “Some people think it’s the holding on that makes one strong - sometimes it’s the letting go.”
Only now, it occurred to me there is no coincidence that the two messages are very much related, that occasionally it’s only when we really “let go” of bad or negative thoughts, feelings, people, work place, relationships, the list goes on and on… that we can feel free, and truly experience joy.
It doesn’t matter how many times someone has told us we should, or how many times we’ve said this to ourselves. As I see it, at times, it doesn’t even matter how close we are physically to the person or situation, it is only when we are ready emotionally, that it is possible.
Every now and then, we will only be able to release a few things, not all of them at once, and this is fine. With some issues, it may take us a day or two, and with others, it could take us years. We shouldn’t be harsh with ourselves when it takes longer than we anticipated, because as Erika Taylor said, “Sometimes you have to take a step back to move forward.”
What can help us to Let Go?
- Make the decision to let go.
- Practice self-affirmation and positive self-talk - validate how you feel and remind yourself how worthy you are.
- Take responsibility for a change that only you can make - either emotionally or practically, rather than being the victim and blaming others.
- Initiate positive feelings and experiences by being with people who make you feel good and valued, or by doing things that make you feel this way.
- Do a Reality Check of the actual power a person / situation / experience has over you NOW.
- If you can, forgive them, but most importantly - forgive yourself!
- Keep on doing the above and give it time.
I have just let go of hurtful feelings that has held me back for years. And while I naturally regret I had to go through such a challenging experience, tonight I feel liberated and free, and Daphne Rose Kingma’s words keep playing in my head: “Holding on is believing that there’s only a past; letting go is knowing that there’s a future.”
Till next time,